[ I guess it's always nice to get mail...even if it's from this guy. ]
In the four and a half years that I?ve run this site, I have had a lot of cuckoo birds write me with all sorts of bizarre things on their minds or reasons why I am terrible. ?I actually keep two scrap books for the mail we get at HB; one is a beautiful emerald journal that could have come from a bookshop in Oz (which is reserved for my favorite nice notes from good people) and the other is a black leather book in which I paste the strangest and most demented hatemail that my writing prompts from the cuckoo birds. So far, nothing?s ever topped the screed I got from a black lady with a blonde wig named BeLynda who wrote in to accuse me of being ?secretly black? and ?trying to pass as Anglo when (I) am really secretly of African descent?. ?I almost put that one in the green book because it makes me laugh and laugh. ?Not normal laughing?but rolling around on the floor, unable to catch my breath laughing?laughing like that old man in Mary Poppins who died laughing and went up to the ceiling. ?That was hilarious.
Today?s ?Hatemail of the Day? is just gross, though. ?I?m posting it below the fold because the man who wrote it ? Floyd Jones Jr. ? went into graphic and bizarre detail about why he specifically hates me for being a gay person and why he finds gay people ?utterly absurd?. Last night, I had an email exchange with a very nice woman who didn?t understand why her comments on this site kept going into moderation. ?I actually really like this woman and tried explaining to her that the spam and troll filters are set extremely high on the site to keep lunatics from taking the place over and posting filth everywhere.
One of the things I dislike about the Internet is the ability for the unhinged and deranged to make sites unreadable by foisting nastiness and negativity everywhere. ?There are conservative sites run by people I love on a personal level and whom I enjoy reading as writers?but I cringe going over there because they leave their comment sections unmoderated and open to all sorts of nasty fights and the agendas of trolls, goblins, and cuckoo birds. ?From Day One at HB, I?ve always maintained this as a moderated site because I didn?t want to see that sort of nastiness infect something I worked hard on every day. ?I don?t allow that sort of nastiness around me in real life, and I was not going to let that filth accumulate in a place I maintained for my friends (even if I didn?t know all of them personally yet). ?I think every site out there can strive to be more positive if it just clipped some people?s ability to spread mental illness to others or projectile-vomit their personal defects onto a computer screen.
I was really concerned by my email exchange with the nice lady who took it very personally that her comments always seemed to go into moderation, though; it just happens that the way she posted things always set off the spam filters and troll detectors and her comments had to wait until someone could approve them from moderation. ?I actually have a few friends who help with the comments section because I?m usually too busy to keep my eye on this all day?and I know it might be frustrating if your comment does not post immediately. ?I?ve tried a lot of different tricks through the years in attempts to make this process easier and faster, but it is what it is. ?I told the nice lady who emailed me about her comments not posting that the spam filters remind me of this fence they had on The Walking Dead last season that protected this one farm from zombie hordes that wandered the countryside. ?The fence made life for everyone a little harder because they had to go all the way around it to get anywhere, but without the fence the farm would have been overrun with ghouls. ?That actually happened in the season finale last year when the fence broke and then in poured the zombies.
All that really protects HB from being like other sites out there that are overrun by trolls, goblins, and cuckoo birds is the spam filter?as imperfect as it is. ?I actually have it set to look for any curse words in a comment because I?d rather there not be any profanity here (I like it to be a PG-13 site that anyone in the family can read, even if teens might not get all the jokes). ?I hate being a scold (and I am really not like this in real life, I swear) but I do have the spam filter zap the words ?liberals? and ?progressives? too, because people should be saying ?lefties? or ?Leftists? when talking about Democrats. ?Those other words (?liberals? and ?progressives?) are bad words in my book because they help Democrats; every time you say or write one of them you are essentially giving Democrats $5.00 in free brand reinforcement?as if you were contributing this directly to the Obama campaign. ?I know Rush and Ann Coulter say ?liberal? about 175 times a day on the air, but it doesn?t make it right. ?I wish they?d stop too?and if they tried to comment here and write about ?liberals? instead of ?lefties? or ?Leftists? they?d end up in the spam filter with everyone else!
I also don?t allow people to post links to sites that might be dangerous, hoping someone unwitting clicks on a link that would send them to a place that could harm their computer so I personally look at every link that?s posted to make sure it?s safe before I allow a comment with links in them. ?Literally, I just scan comments for bad words or use of ?liberal? or ?progressive? and try to determine why the filter flagged a comment for review. ?It?s very rare for me to not allow something to post?and I only do it if the commenter is being nasty, trying to attack someone personally, is attempting to link to someplace bad, or is going on about ?those liberals!?.
Every once in a while someone goes absolutely nuts over being in moderation and then decides to hate me forever because of it, which I find disturbing. ?There?s a guy named Mark in Florida who I actually had to ban from commenting because he kept trying to make racial cracks at Michelle Obama and compare her to primates in comments here, which I just won?t allow. ?I don?t like Michelle Antoinette and think she has been a poor excuse for a First Lady but I will always stand up for her to anyone who tries to make racial cracks against her or who attempts to slander any black person by using pejoratives like that. ?Not on my watch, buddy. ?And there is no second chance with that. ?There is no ?I?m sorry and I won?t do it again?. ?You did it once and you are now banned because someone who tries to sneak a nasty race-based attack on Michelle or any black person here gets immediately zapped to the Phantom Zone for good. ?If I could block these people from even being able to read this site I would, but all I can do is prevent them from ever commenting again (which is why you never see this sort of thing here).
I?ve said all the above to prep you for what you?ll see below in just a minute?because it?s an example of what would fill up the comment threads here if I did not do what I do every day to moderate and prevent nastiness from seeping in here. ?This is the sort of ghoul who?d break through if I didn?t have the magic fence protecting HB from the horrors of the Internet at large. ?This is the kind of filth that people try to post here?and when they can?t get it to post, they decide to just email it to me. ?Because they think we?re friends like that. Most of this hatemail I forward to my friend The Tamminator and she and I laugh at how insane these cuckoos are who take the time to write things like this to strangers. ?Some of the scarier and more menacing stuff I PDF and compile for police reports to document the more aggressive hate mailers or submit as evidence if I ever need to sue one of these people for harassment (which I?ve now done to three of them).
As I told the nice lady earlier who said her comments always got caught in the spam filters, THIS is what would fill up threads if I didn?t moderate this site so aggressively:
From: floyd.g.jones@gmail.com
To: hillbuzz@gmail.com
Date:?Tue, Oct 16, 2012 at 7:32 PM
Subject: The Udder Absurdity of Homosexuality
Homosexuality is a bad case of runaway?promiscuity.? When one idiot orally services his sex buddy, he is risking getting fecal bacteria in his gumline from the guy who was sodomized just a day or so ago.?Also, can you not see the absolute stupidity of one man fertilizing another man?s fecal expulsion tract?? Let me tell you that sperm ? washed turds are only going to miscarry right into the toilet.? So much for the procreational efforts of sodomites.?Remember, the more and the louder that homosexuals rage for their agendas to be accepted by sane society, the closer they are to their destruction.? Those of us who are fortunate enough to be far away enough from the site of the disaster will have the pleasure of living to see another day.? See Genesis 19 for an account of homosexuals getting their payday.
If this is all too much information for you, please feel free to stop reading now?but as a public service I will take the time to note how ignorant this man, Floyd Jones Jr., is and how much he reminds me of six-time Democrat candidate for statewide office Fred Phelps of Kansas (a personal friend of Al Gore?s for many years). ?I think someone should refute the craziness and homophobia in this rant, if for no other reason than to show you how it can be done in case you ever have something vile like this hit your in-box.
First of all, not all gay guys are promiscuous (though Pride Parade weekend in June makes it seem that way). ?I?m not promiscuous and never have been. ?I?ve always only ever dated one guy at a time.
My first boyfriend was in college when I was 18, and for a while there in my late teens and early 20s I?d probably date one or two guys a year casually and those relationships would last about 3-6 months (which is typical for gay male relationships). ?I never dated a girl or felt any need to have a fake girlfriend or beard or anything. ?I?ve had a total of 15 boyfriends now, with Justin being the one I hope is for keeps. ?Out of that 15, only two ended up being terrible people and I?m still good friends with the other twelve (in addition to Justin, of course). ?It?s funny that the two bad apples also turned out to be guys who are VERY far Left and deep in the Obama cult?which became a problem after 2008 when I no longer considered myself a Democrat. ?If Hillary Clinton had become the nominee instead of Obama, it?s strange but I bet the two guys I dated who are now antagonistic to me would have probably remained friends. ?So weird to think how many things would have been different if only Hillary, not Obama, had been the standard bearer of the Democrat Party four years ago.
Floyd said: When one idiot orally services his sex buddy, he is risking getting fecal bacteria in his gumline from the guy who was sodomized just a day or so ago.
Kevin says: Okay, I hope they wash your mouth out with soap back in Mayberry or wherever for writing things like this and sending it to people. ?Because this is just gross, man. ?I so don?t want to have a conversation with the general public about my sex life but I think it?s important for straight people to know that not all gay guys are into anal sex. ?It might be shocking to Floyd, but there are a good number of us who don?t do that and have no interest in it. ?In the 70s, there was a weird push in gay culture to do all sorts of heteronormative things?where gay couples would ape straight people and do things that were the gay equivalent of male/female relationships. ?I think that?s when gay magazines started pushing for guys to engage in anal sex, so that one could be defined as the penetrative ?man? and the other would then be the receptive ?woman?. For reasons I don?t quite understand to this day, some straight people like thinking that gay relationships are setup like one guy is the husband and the other is the wife. ?That?s not how it works. ?It?s actually more like older brother/younger brother in most cases?where one guy is either really a little older (like with me and Justin, who is ten years my junior) or one guy is more alpha than the other (which is true of every single gay relationship?where one personality is just stronger than the other). ?I have no idea how lesbian relationships work, but two guys living together always seems to shake out the way it would with brothers growing up?only there?s a romantic side to it that?s not there with brothers (in all but the most bizarre of cases).
Before this site took up all my free time, I used to volunteer with some AIDS organizations here in Chicago because one of my exes became infected (years after we were together) and I wanted to do something in his honor to educate people about STDs (since he got HIV by partying, doing drugs, and having bareback sex in a bathhouse like the ones Barack Obama used to go to here in Chicago in his ?Bathhouse Barry? days). ?One of the most shocking things I learned in the sexual education seminars I took while volunteering is that more straight people engage in anal sex than gay guys. ?You need to wrap your head around that for a second, but it?s because there are clearly many more straight people than gay guys in this country and since the Internet made porn available to teenaged guys in the late 90s there has been two generations know that have grown up seeing porn movies with straight couples having anal intercourse. ?So, it?s become a fetish for a lot of straight men?and they make their wives and girlfriends do this as a pregnancy-risk-free type of thing.
It?s scary because a lot more women are getting HIV today as a result because they don?t think to make the guy wear a condom (and no one tells women this). ?Honestly, it might be the most awkward conversation you ever have with your daughter but if you have a child who is sexually active please tell her to always make the guy wear a condom. ?Pregnant? is the last thing women should be worried about ?getting? from a guy today. ?A baby can be given up for adoption after nine months?but HIV/AIDS is forever.
I know this is uncomfortable to read ? and it?s all uncomfortable for me to write ? but what if someone needed this information and God?s way of getting it to the person was to inspire old Floyd to write me hatemail that allowed an opportunity to tell you things you might have never known before.
Floyd said:?Also, can you not see the absolute stupidity of one man fertilizing another man?s fecal expulsion tract?? Let me tell you that sperm ? washed turds are only going to miscarry right into the toilet.? So much for the procreational efforts of sodomites.
Kevin says: ?Floyd, really. ?Did Aunt Bea let you eat her pies with a mouth like that? ?Miss Clara ought to slap you silly. ?All I have to say about this weirdness from you is that for a straight man you sure spend a lot of time thinking about this. I?m gay and I can honestly say I have never thought about two straight people having sex or two lesbians having sex. ?I?ve never ever seen that, except in movies where they cut away before anything happens. ?I can?t imagine even being someone who has time in his day to think about other people having sex and what?s being fertilized or not fertilized. ?That?s just beyond bizarre for me.
Do you honestly think people are trying to get pregnant having anal sex? ?Because when you say ?So much for the procreational efforts of sodomites? it sounds like you think guys are hoping they?ll get each other pregnant, or maybe straight guys trying to get their wives pregnant like that or something. This is the second most bizarre thing anyone?s ever sent me besides that BeLynda woman who accused me of being secretly black.
Floyd said:?Remember, the more and the louder that homosexuals rage for their agendas to be accepted by sane society, the closer they are to their destruction.? Those of us who are fortunate enough to be far away enough from the site of the disaster will have the pleasure of living to see another day.? See Genesis 19 for an account of homosexuals getting their payday.
Kevin says:?I had an ex named Harvey whose mother was a withered, nasty, mean spirited thing who was absolutely one of the most vile people I?d ever met. ?She would always use the word ?homosexual?, as in ?This is my homosexual son and his homosexual companion?. ?I wanted to introduce her to people by saying, ?This is Harvey?s mother, the troglodyte?. ?The preferred term to use is ?gay?. ?As in, this is my ?gay son?. ?Even better, just say ?this is my son? and people are usually smart enough in 2012 to figure out the rest.
I actually agree with Floyd that the ?gay community? is ridiculous and ?gay leaders? (always self-appointed) tend to screech and wail and make a nuisance of themselves. ?Gay people often accuse Christians of being evil to them but it?s actually gays who mock and persecute Christians. ?I?m actually involved in a complaint here in Chicago against a business that openly discriminates against gay Christians?saying that they need to choose a side and that side better be mocking Christians and maligning religious people because otherwise I am a ?traitor to the gay community?.
There really is no ?gay community?. ?Democrats try to control gays and keep them on the Democrat plantation by perpetually inventing issues to hammer?and wedges to drive between gays and their families. ?With DADT resolved, the new thing Democrats are doing is promoting risky, bareback sex in young gay guys so that AIDS infection makes a big comeback and there?s a new epidemic. ?Democrats want this so that gays will have to depend on Democrats for their AIDS cocktails. ?This is a big thing right now, ?Poz Pride?, where the ?gay community? is telling young gay guys they don?t have to worry about HIV anymore because catching it is actually a ?gift? and then they don?t have to worry anymore about getting it because they already now have it. ?There are tons of Poz-friendly parties?and a whole marketing push coordinated by Democrat groups to take all the stigma out of catching HIV.
The endgame is to infect a new generation of HIV cases so that there are always gay men out there who are suffering and need to rely on Democrats in office to provide them free or reduced costs meds. ?This is similar to how Democrats want to keep blacks poor, in broken families, and dependent on entitlements and how Democrats want to keep Hispanics from learning English so that they are forced to live in ghettos and speak only Spanish their whole lives.
The Democrat Party is evil, folks, but you already knew that.
I really am not going to comment on Floyd?s bible study ending there but I will tell you that I once knew a woman who was so expert on the Bible that she could condemn just about anyone for anything by citing random verses. ?It was a sight to behold.
We are all sinners. ?There is a Bible verse that applies negatively against each of us.
The thing is, I?m a guy who likes other guys. ?I?ve never been attracted to girls. ?Almost all of my friends in life have been girls, but the people who have fascinated me and made my heart race have always been men. ?I think I?ve made good choices in who I?ve dated. ?There have been photographers, dancers, actors (including one who became a movie star, but I won?t ever tell who so don?t even ask), singers, songwriters, composers, artists, writers, politicos, athletes, Marines, Mormons, and an architect (Justin). ?Even the two I don?t care for anymore (Harvey and Jacobi) had their merits back in the day or I wouldn?t have been with them. I just wish they weren?t such jerks now.
I?ve been very blessed by having all these people in my life?and I think I am exactly how God made me. ?I don?t think I live up to my potential every day and I?m sure I disappoint Him sometimes, but I don?t think God wanted me to be alone and not have such great relationships in my life.
I?ve very happy with Justin. ?He is a great and sweet guy. ?I love him. ?He drives me nuts sometimes. ?He?s not always thrilled with me either. ?But it works and I am happy.
I think I have a right to be happy.
We all do.
God would want it that way, I believe.
For the Bible tells me so.
? 2012, Kevin DuJan. All rights reserved.
Kevin DuJan
Gay conservative political analyst, essayist, author and radio and TV commentator on politics, pop culture, LGBTQ issues, and current events. To email Kevin directly with a comment or complaint about this or any article, do so at: HillBuzz@gmail.com
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